Hi Journal-

Exercise- walked for 20 minutes total on lunch and breaks. No other signifigant exercise.

Food-
1 medium coffee, milk and sugar
1 plain naked bagel
0.5 c skim milk with coffee and 3 sugars
2 c mixed green veggies with 2 T dressing and 0.25 c shredded cheese
0.25 c applesauce
5 Milano cookies
3 diet colas (working on #3)
1 c homeade stir fry - 1/4 chicken with 3/4 cabbage and leeks.
0.25 c rice for stir fry
0.5 c animal crackers
1 medium apple

Otherwise-
I know I'm not meeting the production goals at work. So what's the problem? My thoughts "wander" and I stare off into space, totally oblivious to everything around me. I should be reviewing and completing claims, but my brain has decided otherwise. It is possible for me to take my wandering brain and retrain it on work, but it takes a lot of energy out of me. It feels unnatural and forced. One day spent concentrating like that ends up feeling like three days with no sleep. I end up with eye strain and a persistent low grade headache.

For my life, I have one bottom line: be aware of your limits. If this "wandering" of my brain is telling me that focusing on work and school at the same time is too much for me to handle in my current frame of mind, then I have to find a new way to cope. I won't let go of either one.

How about painting my fingernails and changing the color every week?
Or changing my wardrobe to neo-pagan, all black with lots of silver jewelry?
Maybe a really short hair cut?
Or putting a few more dreams on the shelf: sewing, knitting, building shelves out of tin cans?
Or dropping all my shame and reluctance, and jumping on the WW wagon? Going overboard and posting all the food guidelines in my cubicle at work?
Or letting go of my online journal?

Hmmm. Definately not the last one!